Tuesday, March 07, 2006


One of my closest friends, Anna (or "Nanners", as I affectionately call her) is returning home, more than likely as I type this. She's been in Israel for the past 6 months working for The Man. And no, I don't mean some corporate hoity-toity big shot. I mean God.

I know I've posted one blog entry talking about God and faith and whatnot, but aside from that, I try to keep that part of my life close to me. I know some people would argue that that's not spreading God's Word, and that I'm being lazy about my faith. Well, you know what? I'm not going to deny that. God and I have our rocky patches. To me, He is truly like a parent. I accept and understand that He knows what's best for me, and yet, I still get very angry with Him for putting certain obstacles in they way of, well, my life. So truly, God and I have not always seen eye to eye, and yet, I never let Him go and, deep down, I know He never lets go of me. You know how I know this? There is no possible way that I could survive half of what I've gone though without Him backing me up. I'm just physically, mentally, and emotionally not that strong. But that's just me.

Anyway, even as I write this, I feel very uncomfortable. I always told myself I would not be one of those Christians you see on TBN at midnight, screaming scriptures from the Bible, palm-smacking people on the head, "healing" them as they faint into the arms of ginormous Bodyguard Christians. I have always felt that my purpose as a Christian was to work in the situations God lays before me, with the words and thoughts that I ask Him to provide. Otherwise, I'm a bumbling idiot. So, there you have it. A little more insight into a very personal, painful, yet completely necessary part of my life. The uncomfortable feeling remains.

Anyway, my reason for writing this horrifically jumbled blog post was to welcome home a very dear friend and personal mentor of mine. Many people would fall to the ground in the fetal position if faced with some of the things Anna has had to overcome. I believe she does this with an undying dedication to God, and the desire and will to live for Him. She is truly, in my opinion, the epitome of a Christian woman. I look up to and admire her, and I'm not sure I tell her this nearly enough.

I'm not knowledgable on how the time differences work between Israel and the US, and I haven't the brain power to do a simple Google search at this hour, so I will assume that, between the hours I'm at work tomorrow, she will fly home to American soil.

Now, if you will allow me the pleasure of turning things back to myself (as I am prone to do) and to my ramblings of God, I will show you how *I* believe He is working in my life as that certain "Dad that wants to protect you" role.

You will note from my earlier blog entry that I recently had my best friend move to another city, and this caused me a lot of pain for reasons I can't be bothered* to explain. So, when I was whining and complaining to Him about Nic moving away, he was preparing Anna to move back. I was so afraid to lose a friend again that I couldn't open my eyes for a second to see a friend was coming home. God has this really funny way of doing things like that in my life. And that's how I bring it back to me!

So, in a very long, drawn out, spiritually uncomfortable and unsettling blog post: Happy Return Home, Nanners. You've been missed but will be lovingly received and showered with many coffee nights (well, not LITERALLY showered because that would buuuuuuurn, but you know what I'm getting at).

Sidenote: I know many of you won't have much to say in the form of a comment to this post, so no worries if you don't. It was more for me than anything.

*Oooh, look! I used a Brit term!

Insignificance Conveyed @ 8:03 PM   10 GabbyGabbers

10 "Sure was sweet of you to drop in":

At 3:03 AM, Blogger Curly "told me"

The cloud behind your weather pixie at the moment makes it look like it has wings. Nifty.

But, you're in bed right now so you can't see it. Nevermind.

At 5:47 AM, Blogger Jona "told me"

'Can't be bothered' is a Brit term? I had no idea! So what would be the US expression?

And safe travelling to Anna :o)

At 6:15 AM, Blogger Me Over Here "told me"

Well, by Brit term, I mostly mean Huw uses it and I never heard the expression. I think the closest thing to it, Lanette-American-style, would be like "I don't want to", or "I don't feel like it". Or something.

At 6:57 AM, Blogger chrissie "told me"

Yay for God and His perfect timing! Have fun catching up with Anna.

At 7:14 AM, Blogger trishy "told me"

trust me, I recently dumped a large cup of hot coffee on my other half and man did it burn him!

At 8:39 AM, Blogger Curly "told me"

Can't be arsed is a better Brit term. Tell your friends.

At 8:55 AM, Blogger Rob West "told me"

I have found that life is much easier when I don't look for meaning. We humans as a species have a highly flawed concept of "fair". We say "Life isn't fair!" I don't think we even know what fair is. There's no such thing as Karma. I don't usually get what I have coming. Sometimes I'm a dick and I get what I want. Sometimes I'm a great guy and I get crapped on. And I began to wonder why... then I realized that even if I knew why, it wouldn't change anything.

The search for meaning in life is futile. Just hang on, and by and by, all will be revealed...

(That Mayor is a wise motherhumper)

At 11:03 AM, Blogger OldHorsetailSnake "told me"

Big Ernie wouldn't let you down, though. He's my bud.

At 6:20 AM, Blogger Chris "told me"

A sweet and wonderful post. It was interesting to read your spiritual musings. Just a note to say I'm very appreciative of the way you have represented your spirituality. I think if you were one of those TBN people then some of us wouldn't be reading. I'm generally opposed to proselytisation. I'm a great believer in personal spirituality, and our own right to be the sole judges of our own faith (or lack thereof). I think you have got the balance perfect in this one.

At 1:19 PM, Blogger anna "told me"

Dang! A whole post devoted to me and I'm the 10th post-er!

Thanks Netters--I'm home and gathering strength, and when I'm strong and sinewy, I expect to see you at my doorstep with a huge pot of coffee, ready to initiate me back into the American system with a good ol' burning bath. I might even sue you, McDonald's-style! I love the USA and I love Netters!


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